Katya's Revenge
by Rachael Foley
Summary: Katya Kazanova is back, she is organic like Ray. Not like Barry, who is mainly metal. Season 3 - 9 Skin Game Ms. Kazanova didn't sleep with Barry, merely kicked his ass.
1. Chapter 1

"How you say.. come at me bro!" Katya began her fight with Barry, he hit her back, she had both of her knees by his head as she punched him repeatedly, he threw her off and the lights were shut off, with the window/doors shut.

He launched her through the wall, she kicked him between the legs and did a skull crusher denting the floor. She heard Sterling, talking to the others "Darling.." she murmured "I'm going for him next!" Barry warned

"Like hell you will! This- is for Sterling!" she round house kicked him in the head "This- is for me!" she spinning back kicked him into the wall, "Dasvidaniya!" she flip kicked him, launching him through the buildings wall, and smirked at him fall.

The lights were turned back on, and Ray married the pair. "Katya! That was amazing!" Archer exclaimed "Thank you, darling." she smiled, he slipped Bub's ring on her finger "Just. Great. That sullen whore, is wearing Bub's ring." Malory groaned

Katya's eyes glowed red at Malory's remark "Sorry.. I beg your forgiveness." she was sincere "I bet you do." Malory downed a bottle of champaigne "Jesus! Don't hog it all!" Pam interjected "Oh, go... resource or whatever." Malory rolled her eyes

"So.. you're super strong.." Cheryl put a finger down Katya's body "Dah." Katya answered, puzzled "Can you...?" Cheryl motioned to her neck "Dah, of course." Katya put her hand around Cheryl's neck, and she squeezed a little.

"Sssplooosh." Cheryl smiled Katya's eyes widened as she stared at her "Harder!" Cheryl said almost breathless "No!" Archer took Katya's hand off "Darling?" she asked "Not until later, of course." he grinned.

"Aw, ew!" Ray added "Disgusting, Archer." Cyril chimed in "Well, so long as Katya doesn't object." he looked at her "Dah, of course. Darling." Lana shook her head, this was beyond disgusting. "Krieger! Why do you have an erection!?"

"I'm.. still.. happy." he wiped a tear off his face, everyone stared at him, awkwardly. Archer went home, with Katya and Cheryl, watching Katya and Cheryl first, then going in later on. "Wow." he exclaimed "Dah." Katya added "Sploosh." Cheryl added


	2. Chapter 2

Katya, Pam and Malory cursed at Cheryl's stupidity, she let the evil astronaut inside the shuttle. "I'll go. You comrades, hold down the shuttle." "Roger that." Pam nodded, as she suited up "Katya, dear shouldn't you suit up too?" Malory asked

Katya shook her head "I'm a cyborg.. er.. bionic woman. My darling, Sterling.. needs my help." she picked up a weapon, and rushed off "Sploosh." Pam checked Katya out as she ran past "Oh.. keep it in your pants." Malory rolled her eyes

"Who.. are you?" Tony asked "Your worst nightmare. This, is for my darling." Katya narrowed her green eyes as she ran with unnatural speed, subduing him "Pam.. take him. In case they come, use him.. as how you say.. leverage?" she asked

Pam nodded, Cheryl folded her arms "What about the party!" she yelled "Is no party. That's not what boarding party means." "No party?" Cheryl asked "Nyet." Katya ran off, she heard the security alert, she smiled Sterling obviously got the others out

"Now they're droopier" Lana complained "Aww!" she frowned as she heard him "Lana!" Katya called "Katya?" she asked surprised "Where did you.." "Darling had me hide, in case something were to happen."

"So.. in case he wanted to bang you on the shuttle?" Lana asked "Nye-... Dah.." Lana rolled her eyes "Classic him." "Never mind that. Let's go." Katya handed her the gun "Thanks, Katya." "Dah, now let's how you say.. give them hell."

Lana smirked, and nodded, Katya took her top off "Katya?" Lana asked "Take.. you.." she pointed to the stickers Lana frowned at them, nodded and took her top "How did.." "Your 'darling' ruined my top. Then used it to bandage his arms."

"Was he shot?" Katya asked "No.. just grazed. Still being an asshole though." Katya smiled, she only had a white bra on now, but it was better than Lana had. Katya picked her up "Katya?" she asked, as Katya ran to catch up to the others

"Katya!" Archer called "Darling.." she smiled "Guys, now's not the time!" Ray protested, "Dah. Sorry Ray.." she put Lana down, Lana fired at the wall "Let's go!" "Nope." Archer protested "Why not?" Lana asked pissed

"Ugh! It's full of.. garbage and shit!" Ray plugged his nose "We can eat.. hepatitis' a through e." "Ugh! Just because it was my ide- Guys!" she and Katya noticed they ran off "Oh shit!" Lana saw them fire, Katya and she sped off before it hit them

Katya separated from the group, she saw them get caught and snuck behind them, she saw one of them had a gun to Sterling's head, she clenched her fist as she ran forward "I will save you, darling!" she called, "No.. wait!"

Archer held his hand out, they had stopped, Katya did a skull crusher knocking him out, Cyril reloaded "Suppressive... fire!" he yelled as he shot, everyone ducked, "I think.. I got 'em." "Ya did. You got those two guys.. who were minding their own business!" Lana frowned

"And a black astronaut, Cyril. That's like.. killing a unicorn!" Archer frowned, everyone else nodded, and heard a banging, "Barry!" Archer exclaimed "Modak!" Katya's eyes narrowed as she saw him "Oh, boo hoo. Round two, you and the whore versus me?" Barry asked

Everyone stopped them "Dah, you're right.. I won't.. waste my time." Katya nodded, even Archer gave in, Cyril destroyed his rocket he laughed "_Now _who has a vagina problem, Barry!?" "Me." Pam answered "Ewww!" Everyone said at once

Everyone cheered on Archer, until he crashed the shuttle "Until further notice.. there will be no more health claims." Malory announced, as everyone groaned Archer and Katya the only ones unscathed, Ray rolled out

"Oh come on Ray.. you already had the chair!" he called as he rolled out of the room "Oh! I guess, just pout then!" he stirred his drink, "Did I tell you guys.. I got a pet goat?" he asked trying to lift everyone's moods "Darling.. let's go.." Katya pulled him out of the room


End file.
